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Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Accidents


Accidents

Textbook definition of accident may tell you that it is an unfortunate incident that happens unexpectedly and unintentionally, typically resulting in damage or injury.

It is just something that happened, and nothing else. What about the people who say there is reason behind everything that happens. I don't usually believe in this thinking especially because many things cannot be justified by any reason. But lets go with this for a moment because Master Oogway from Kung Fu Panda said - "There are no accidents", Let's think that there must be a purpose behind anything that we normally feel is an accident.

There are no accidents

Typically, after an accident, you get lot of free time to think over it. In usual case - because you are hurt and are advised to take rest and you are not capable to go to office.

So, was thinking, why would an accident happen when someone is travelling? With no fatal injuries, luckily, touchwood - what could be the reason for the accident.


  1. Was it to teach driving sense - may be not if there is no fault involved as such.
  2. was it to remember God - I don't think this is how it works. Ya, this may be outcome but cannot be reason.
  3. was it to give some rest - in this case, a common cold with mild fever would have been suffice.

Then what?

May be, it was just an accident and no reason for it. An in case there was any reason or lesson to be learnt, I request the One with Power to give more hints on this without injuries. Will try best to learn.

More to come, hopefully. Ouch..

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Will miss you - God of Cricket

He is all what Cricket meant to me. There is just no cricket beyond Sachin Tendulkar. Records are just numbers, pure joy was to watch him play. Its not easy to describe the joy so just pasting some records of His. He wont be playing ODI now on is a really sad news Sachin Retirement was always going to be a sad news. He is the reason why Cricket became like a religion - hence He is like God (at least for me). Here is another article from me about Him - http://smallfunstory.blogspot.com/2012/08/cricket-and-sachin.html



Records are just numbers - watching Him is pure Joy



ODI
  1. Matches Played: 463 ( Most )
  2. Consecutive ODI Appearances: 185
  3. Most Stadium Appearances: 90 different Grounds
  4. Inning appearances: 452 ( Most ). First to appear in 400 innings in ODI matches.
Sachin Tendulkar Most runs in an ODI Innings

Sachin Tendulkar holds the record most runs scored in one ODI innings. He is the one and only batsman to score 200 runs (147ball 25x4 3x6) in an ODI against South Africa
Runs scored:
  1. Most runs in an ODI Innings: Sachin Tendulkar holds the record for being the first batsman to score 200 runs (147 balls 25x4 3x6) in an ODI against South Africa. It was the highest score by any batsman for a while, before Virender Sehwag scored 219 (149 balls, 25x4 7x6) against West Indies in the 4th ODI of the 2011 home series against them
  2. Most runs: Sachin has scored 18426 runs in 452 innings of odi cricket at an astonishing average of 44.83 and blistering strike rate of 86.24.He is the leading run scorer in the ODI format of the game and the only player ever to cross the 14,000-15,000-16,000-17,000 and 18,000 run marks.
  3. Sachin Tendulkar First player to reach 10,000-11,000-12,000-13,000-14,000-15,000, 16,000 and 17,000, 18,000 ODI runs.
  4. Sachin Tendulkar has the record for scoring 1,000 ODI runs in a calendar year.
  5. He has done it seven times - 1994, 1996, 1997, 1998, 2000, 2003 and 2007
  6. Tendulkar has scored over 1000 ODI runs against all major Cricketing nations.
  7. Tendulkar is the only batsman to score over 3000 runs against any opponent (Australia). Tendulkar is also the only batsman to achieve the feat runs against two opponents - Sri Lanka is the other team.
  8. After Sachin crossed the 10,000-run mark in ODIs, only seven other players have managed to cross the milestone: (Sanath Jayasuriya, Sourav Ganguly, Rahul Dravid, Ricky Ponting, Brian Lara, Inzamam ul Haq, and Jacques Kallis).
  9. Sachin was the fastest to reach 10,000 runs taking 259 innings and has the highest batting average among batsmen with over 10,000 ODI runs
  10. Tendulkar holds the record for the highest individual score in a one day international when he scored 200 not out breaking the previous record of 194 in the India vs South Africa ODI on 24 February 2010.
  11. Tendulkar holds the record for the most fours ( boundaries ) in an innings. He hit 25 fours in the innings against South Africa on on 24 February 2010 when he scored double century.
  12. Only player to score 5, 150+ (186*, 152, 163*, 175 and 200*)scores in ODI cricket, followed by Sanath Jayasuriya of Srilanka with 4, 150+ scores in ODI

Centuries and Fifties record:
  1. Most centuries: 49
  2. Only cricketer to ever score a double hundred in the ODI format - against South Africa at Gwalior, India.
  3. Most centuries against an opponent - 9 vs. Australia.
  4. Most centuries vs. Australia, South Africa, Kenya, Sri Lanka, Zimbabwe and Pakistan.
  5. Most centuries in Final Matches 6 & India Win All Matches
  6. Most centuries against One Team - Australia 20 (11 Test+9 ODI)
  7. Most Fifties: 96.
  8. Highest number of above fifty scores in ODIs - 141 (49 Centuries and 96 Fifties).
  9. Most Fifties in World Cup Matches (21)
ODI awards:
  1. Most Man of the Match Awards: 62 Man of the Match Awards
  2. Most Man of the Series Awards: 15 Man of the Series Awards
     
  • Calendar Year record:
  1. Most ODI runs in a calendar year: 1,894 ODI runs in 1998.
  2. Most Centuries in a calendar year: 9 ODI centuries in 1998
     
Sachin Tendulkar Partnership Records in Cricket history
  1. Sachin with Sourav Ganguly hold the world record for the maximum number of runs scored by the opening partnership. They have put together 6,609 runs in 136 matches that includes 21 century partnerships and 23 fifty run partnerships. The 20 century partnerships for opening pair is also a world record.Most century partnerships for opening pair in the cricket history- Ganguly and Sachin put together 20 century partnerships as opening pair.
  2. Sachin and Rahul Dravid hold the world record for the highest partnership in ODI matches when they scored 331 runs against New Zealand in 1999 at the LBS, Hyderabad
  3. Sachin Tendulkar has been involved in six 200 run partnerships in ODI matches - a record that he shares with Sourav Ganguly and Rahul Dravid.
  4. Most runs (2,278 at an average of 56.95 as on 9 April 2011) in World Cup Cricket History including 6 centuries & 15 fifties with a best score of 152* against Namibia in 2003 world cup * 673 runs in 2003 Cricket World Cup, highest by any player in a single Cricket World Cup.
  5. Player Of The World Cup Tournament in the 2003 Cricket World Cup.
  6. 5239 runs in the 1996 Cricket World Cup at an average of 87.16, making him the highest run scorer in the 1996 World Cup and setting the then record for the highest runs by any player in a single Cricket World Cup - subsequently bettered by himself in the 2003 World Cup
  7. Of 462 matches Sachin Tendular has played, India has lost 200 matches.
  8. He has opened Batting 340 times in ODI cricket which is a record.
  9. He has 96 fifties to his credit. Most by any Batsman.
  10. He has scored 50+ runs 145 times in ODI cricket.
Sachin Tendulkar World Cup Records
  1. Most Runs. (2120 Runs)
  2. Most Fifties. (13 Fifties)
  3. Most Hundreds. (6 Hundreds)
  4. Most runs in a series. (673 runs in 2003 World Cup)
  5. Highest Partnership runs for 3rd wicket. (237 Runs with Rahul Dravid). Game Appearances:
Test
  1. Tendulkar has played the most number of Test Matches (192).
  2. On his Test debut, Sachin Tendulkar was the third youngest debutant (16y 205d). Mushtaq Mohammad (15y 124d) and Aaqib Javed (16y 189d) debuted in Test matches younger to Tendulkar. Since then, there have been 2 players who were younger than Sachin on their Test Cricket debut: Hasan Raza - Pakistan (14y 227d), the current youngest debutant, and Mohammad Sharif - Bangladesh (15y 128d).

Runs Scored:
  1. Highest run scorer in the history of Test cricket with 15562 Test runs.
  2. Career Average (1989–2012, 192 Tests, 15,562 runs) at 54.60
  3. Became the first Indian to surpass the 11,000 Test run mark and the third International player behind Allan Border and Brian Lara. Lara took 213 innings, Sachin 223 and Border 259.
  4. Second Indian after Sunil Gavaskar to make over 10,000 runs in Test matches.
  5. Tendulkar and Brian Lara are the fastest to score 10,000 runs in Test cricket history. Both of them achieved this in 195 innings.
  6. Sachin Tendulkar (8145) world record of runs scored in Tests away from home.
  7. Sachin Tendulkar (29) world record of Centuries in Tests away from home.
  8. First player to reach 12,000-13,000-14,000,15000 Test runs.
  9. Holds the record for scoring most 1,000 Test runs in a calendar year. He has done it Six times - 2010 (1600), 2008 (1063), 2002 (1392 runs), 1999 (1088 runs), 2001 (1003 runs) and 1997 (1000 runs).
  10. Sachin Tendulkar is the fourth highest run-getter in a single calendar year in Test History. He has scored 1562 runs in 2010 and is behind Mohammad Yousuf (1780 runs in 2006), Viv Richards (1710 runs in 1976) and Graeme Smith (1656 runs in 2008).
  11. Sachin Tendulkar created yet another record on 8th November 2011 when he became the first cricketer to score 15,000 runs in Test cricket, during the opening Test match against the West Indies at the Feroz Shah Kotla Stadium in New Delhi.
  12. Sachin Tendulkar created a world record" Sachin Tendulkar sets one more world record for aggregating most runs in Tests". Cricket Country. Retrieved 11 November 2011. for aggregating most runs in the fourth innings in Tests, going past Rahul Dravid's tally of 1507 runs during India's second innings of the first Test against West Indies.
Centuries:
 
  1. Highest number of Test centuries(51), overtaking Sunil Gavaskar's record (34). On October 10, 2010 in Bengaluru (Bangalore) against Australia in the Border-Gavaskar trophy's second and final test match Sachin Tendulkar reached a milestone. With a single to third man, Tendulkar reached his 6th double century and his 49th test century.
  2. Highest number of 150+ score in Test Cricket (20)
  3. When Tendulkar scored his maiden century in 1990, he was the second youngest to score a century. Only Mushtaq Mohammad had scored a century at a younger age by 1990. Tendulkar's record was bettered by Mohammad Ashraful in 2001/02 season. The record for previous youngest Indian centurion was held by Kapil Dev.
  4. Tendulkar's record of five centuries before he turned 20 is a current world record.
  5. Tendulkar holds the current record (217 against NZ in 1999/00 Season) for the highest score in Test cricket by an Indian when captaining the side. Gavaskar held the previous record (205 against West Indies in Bombay - 1978/79 season)
  6. Tendulkar has scored centuries against all Test playing nations. He was the third batman to achieve the distinction after Steve Waugh and Gary Kirsten. The current list also includes Brian Lara, Ricky Ponting, Rahul Dravid, Jacques Kallis, Adam Gilchrist and Marvan Atapattu.
  7. Tendulkar's 37th century against Bangladesh during the 2nd Test , made history as the 1st time the top four batsmen of any team had all scored centuries in a single innings. Dinesh Karthik (129), Wasim Jaffer (138) and Rahul Dravid (129) were the other centurions in the innings.
     
Combined (ODI & Test & T20I) records
  1. First batsman in history to score 100 centuries in international cricket. He now has 100 Centuries (51 in Tests and 49 in ODIs), which is the record for the highest number of centuries in international cricket.
  2. First batsman in history to complete 33,000 runs in (ODIs+Tests). He has now scored 33969 runs [ODI(18426)+Test(15533)+T20(10)]
  3. Most overall runs in international cricket, (ODIs+Tests+Twenty20s), with 33,000 + runs overall ( in Tests, in ODIs)
  4. Record of getting out the maximum number of times in the 90s in international matches. He has been dismissed 27 times (17 in ODIs and 10 in Tests) on scores of 90-99. The 18 nineties (dismissed 17 times and not out once) in ODIs are an ODI record too.


More to come, hopefully.

Saturday, December 1, 2012

My favorite movies


The most interesting topic of all for me. My most favorites of all time till time now. I am starting with movies, because its lot easier as well as generic for all. I am just going to write about few of the movies which I really really love or with which I had a great time watching.

First in the list is the movie which I have seen a million times - Andaz Apna Apna. I do not think this movie needs any introduction. 

Amar and Prem flees after fooling and robbing respective fathers Murli Manohar and Bankelal Bhopali. Meets Anand Akela on the way and enters contest to win over heart of Raveena. Ends up falling in love with Raveena and Karishma whose father Ram Gopal Bajaj is kidnapped by twin brother Shyam Gopal Bajaj aka Teja assissted by Robert and Bhalla. They are chased by Crime master Gogo. Special appearances by Juhi Chawla and Govinda and a chameo character Johnny from Wah-Wah Productions completes the amazing rollercoaster ride called Andaz Apna Apna.



The above synopsis works when you have seen the movie number of times, which I assume you have had already. If you have not yet watched it - find an excuse for yourself if you ever tell this to anyone and do it today and now.

You know what, I was going to write about other favorite movies of mine but I just cannot now. I cannot list any other movies like I can Andaz Apna Apna. This movie is simply a run away winner when it comes to a movie which you can watch again and again with same degree of entertainment. Add to it, good music too.

The best way to watch this movie again and again is to start the movie and let the fans do the rest. Guess the next scene, next dialogues. Say it loud when the movie is playing. This is how it is done!!

You will find huge collection of dialogues from this movie all over the internet. Some of my favorites are:

Bhalla: ye Vasko Da Gama ki gun hai.....
Teja: kiske mama ki gun ?



Happy birthday Robert

Mogambo ka batija hu. Gogo.. aaya ho kuch to loot k jao ga.. khandani chor ho ha.ha.ha.ha

ye teja teja kya hai...ye teja teja

Teja:Maine pachaas lakh mange the...ye pachaas lakh thaili me leke aaye hai
Robert:sir lakh lakh ke pachaas cheque honge sir.


I can go on and on and on. Let me stop here on Andaz Apna Apna. More to come, hopefully.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Women and Men


Yes, finally, I am writing about this topic. It's too complicated to compare these two genders because they are so much opposite. So I am not comparing here. What I am going to do is leave away some free advice, helpful to all to keep up or make a relationship in a happy way.

FYI - I am no expert in anything. I am just putting my guesses and this is work of fiction. Just read and feel free to agree or disagree. Lets starts with some fun before I drop some gold knowledge.

I found two diaries from a day, a married couple's. Here is a day from it.

Woman's diary - 27 May 2012

Saw him in the evening and he was acting really strangely. I went shopping in the afternoon with the girls and I did turn up a bit late so I thought it might be that. The cafe was really crowded and loud so I suggested we go somewhere quieter to talk. He was still very subdued and distracted so I suggested we go somewhere nice to eat.

All through dinner he just didn't seem himself; he hardly laughed, and didn't  seem to be paying any attention to me or to what I was saying. I just knew that something was wrong. He dropped me back home and I wondered if he  as going to come in; he hesitated, but followed.

I asked him again if there was something the matter but he just half shook is head and turned the television on. After about 10 minutes of silence, I said I was going upstairs to bed. I told him that I loved him deeply. He just gave a sigh, and a sad sort of smile.

He didn't follow me up, but later he did. He still seemed distant and a bit cold, and I started to think that he was going to leave me, and that he had found someone else.

I cried myself to sleep.


Man's diary - 27 May 2012

My team lost IPL final today. Gutted. Better luck next time Chennai. Supported because I made a bet.
Note to self: support other team or stop betting.

Plus, wife did more shopping today. Third day in a row. What is happening here.


Some fun off the Internet:



BOY : I can't leave you... 
GIRL : Do you love me so much?? 
BOY : It's not that. You're standing on my foot. 


BOY : May I hold your hand??
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.


GIRL : Did you miss me while I was away?? 
BOY : Were you away?? 


GIRL : Who was that girl I saw you kissing last night? 
BOY : What time was it?? 


GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me! 
BOY : You love me ... 


GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?? 
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number?? 


GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest ... 
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple. 


GIRL : Do you remember when you proposed to me? I was so 
overwhelmed, I couldn't speak for an hour ... 
BOY : Yes Darling, that was the happiest hour of my life ... 


GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever ... 
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve?? 


BOY : I love you and I could die for you! 
GIRL : How soon?? 


GIRL1: Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss?? 
GIRL2: I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth


BOY : I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours! 
GIRL : I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours!!! 


BOY : Hi! Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice? 
GIRL : Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice!!! 


BOY : May I have the pleasure of this dance? 
GIRL : No, I'd like to have some pleasure too!!! 


BOY : Will you come out with me this Saturday? 
GIRL : Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend!!! 


BOY : Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out! 
GIRL : Okay, get out!!! 


BOY : Shall we go and see a film? 
GIRL : I've already seen it!!! 


BOY : Do you think it was fate which brought us together? 
GIRL : Nah, it was plain bad luck


Okay now, did you get the point? Man and Woman are different - a lot different. I think marriage was supposed to be a magic or supernatural activity to keep them together. 

Jokes apart, here is a real thing. You may be guessing, if you don't know, that fights are like regular in relationships. Somewhere it's monthly, yearly, quarterly, and very sad - may be daily. But no matter how many people say that fight is proof that you care - I would say - fight always sucks. To stay away from fights as much as possible, know each other in behavior especially reactions under stress. 

Mostly, when fight happens, stress imbibes. Many a times, stress comes first and fight comes later. Typically, under stress, men tend to withdraw and isolate while women seek support to their emotions. So probably you can guess when the other person is in stress by the behavior and help console. Also remember to respect the way other person want to handle stress and not push your way in. Most important, time will make it right mostly. Trust this, many things should hopefully smooth out.

More to come, hopefully.

Friday, November 9, 2012

It is Diwali time

What new to write was one of the few questions I came across today (Isn't this surprising!!). Diwali is just around the corner so I was thinking to write a bit about it. So the question is, do I write about Diwali festival the way I use to write essay in school? FYI - I used to score not-so-bad, may be about 7.5 or 8 out of 10. Usually starting with the days of Diwali, their importance and also some personal experiences of Diwali celebrations.

Ya... let's skip this method of writing because I have something really interesting thing going in my mind. I am recalling my previous Diwali celebrations and the progress of my thoughts about Diwali. Hope this interests the readers. Please forgive me if the technicalities of Diwali are either missing or incomplete due to my ignorance.

Day - Naraka Chaturdashi: Celebrated for Narakasura's killing by Krishna.
I used to think it is the day when we have to take bath before sunrise called Abhyanga Snaan. Fire crackers, lights and prayers. I used to think that the this day of Diwali is to find out how many things can you do when actually in sleep. Many times I discovered that bathing is one of the things that I can do even when in sleep.

Day - Lakshmi Puja: Worshipping Devi Lakshmi. Most important day of Diwali. For many years, it had been a day of taking out and adoring old and very old coins (which are only used during Puja). Then find something which was forgotten long back like silver whistle (which I always fell in love at sight with) from don't-at-all-know when. Also, during the times I was very much interested in fire crackers, this was the most awaited evening. Fire crackers used to go up as soon as Puja starts.

Now-a-days however, I refrain from any fire crackers. In fact, it's a strict no  from my side to blow any noisy stuff. It does cause hysteric problems to many living beings.

Day - Bhaubeej (Bhaiduj/Yama Dwitiya): Celebrates the story of Yama visiting his sister Yami (river Yamuna) and giving her gift.
I always thought this day as a mini-Rakshabandhan except for Rakhi. My favorite day.

Day - Dhanatrayodashi: Celebrates the birth of Dhanvantari during "Samudra manthan".
For me, this is day of shopping especially of Gold. Not really interested in this totally because of lack of interest in any jewels but it's very important day and I remember many new things being bought on this day of Diwali.

Day - Padwa:  Month of Kartik starts. Special day for Husband and wife.
Don't remember me doing anything with my wife on this day. Oh wait, I am not yet married.

I love festivals. I love Diwali. The smell of fire crackers. The fragrance of "Utna". The eatables made as "Faral". Even though the job and professional life has restricted my time spend on Diwali at home, I still enjoy every bit of it as much as I can.

Recently, last few Diwali times have been full of many experiences. For once or twice, I missed being at home on Diwali due to job. Another time I drove about 500 km to home. Family pulling me in marriage related discussions on Diwali is now usual from last year or so but luckily; as it proved; it has been good to be not married yet.
Another time was when I drove 600 km something from home to work location. The eating till you can't even stand the smell stuff when you visit friends' homes on Diwali. 

Oh.. so many things. Just so so many of them. Could start a separate blog on it. Have a safe and happy Diwali.
Happy Diwali

More to come, hopefully.

Sunday, November 4, 2012

How to stay Young

It's official. Looking young is very important. You may look bizarre  untidy, sleepy or anything but first you must look young. I think looking young starts with feeling young. I personally don't know the difference between feeling old and feeling young. I have always felt the same way young and awesome (generally I mean, leave away the patches).

Just like my Tips for a healthy Life and Instruction Manual for Life, this write will also be considered as some ideas to make living more enjoyable. I think if anyone can just try and keep up with below tips, they can start to feel the difference right away.

1. Age, Height and Weight are only numbers - you can throw all these out. Let  the doctors and trainers worry about it. That's for what you pay them.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches and sad ones pull you down. You may initially feel that you should keep all together, but believe me, keeping cheerfuls closer is always the right idea. Staying happy is your Birth Right.

3. Remember - idle mind is devil's laboratory. So keep your mind busy. You can keep exploring new things on the subjects of your interests or even on general topics like computers, internet, crafts, gardening, sketching, painting, whatever.

4. Enjoying small little simple things is very very very important. Simply because this is one of your Birth Duty that comes along with your Birth Right of staying happy always. Small things keep on happening and big things happen once in a while. Enjoying small things makes you enjoy life all the time. When big things happen, you will enjoy more.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laughing is the one feeling that you will remember for a long long time. How many times you recalled an incident saying "that day we laughed like anything." or "literally ROFL - stomach hurts". Laugh till you gasp for breath.

6. Yes I know life is not always one ways. The tears happen. Heart breaks. We are hurt by small and big things many times. But that's no reason to give up enjoying. Endure, grieve and move on. The only person who is with us entire lifetime is us. So, be Alive.

7. What surrounds you, influences you. So surround yourself with what you love. Friends, family, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.

8. Trips. Who likes these? Almost all. Take any trip anywhere. But DON'T take guilt trips ever. That's the worst place to be. Go to shop or a mall or a city or country but NOT where guilt is.

9. As I have said once before in old post - Health is wealth. Cherish it. Preserving good health and improving unstable health is the trick. This is one of the most difficult things. Well, if you can't do much work to improve it. At least don't do what will degrade it. If you need help, get it.

10. Live every moment. Make an effort to Live it all the time rather than just making it go past.


More to come, hopefully.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Side effects - symptom, cause and cure


Long time, I haven't written anything here. Well, this is another forward that I found hilarious. Further analysis of this proves that the below stuff was written with deep understanding of the subject and also with something that scientist would call "lateral thinking" for finding solutions.

This first thing when a problem arise is Not to find solution directly but to find the problem itself. Many times we don't even acknowledge that the problem has come up. When we do, the problem is scattered so much that we could not find the exact problem to fix. Then comes the root cause searching. After the root cause is known, think of the remedies that may help!!!

I am here talking about an email which addressed few problems. Don't be surprised on the group of problems please, just find the relevance, if you ever have been in any of these - there is a remedy given for you. Next time, execute it. I think we are elder enough to talk about this...Also the fact that my parents are not going to read this ;)

Here we go - I think we are elder enough to talk about Side effects of alcohol and remedies in the form of symptom, cause and cure.

------------
The Hangover

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet. 
Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the Drink on your feet).
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward 

2. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights. 
Cause: You're lying on the floor. 
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor. 

3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry. 
Cause: You're looking through an empty glass. 
Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite drink! 

4. Symptom: The floor is moving. 
Cause: You're being dragged away. 
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you! 

5. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks. 
Cause: You have your glass on your ear. 
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!     

6. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny. 
Cause: You're in the wrong house. 
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.     

7. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and The music is very repetitive. 
Cause: You're in an ambulance. 
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job. 


More to come, hopefully.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Tips for a healthy Life

 After the Instruction manual for Life, here are some tips for health life. Its not important to mention that I do not follow all pretty well but it is important to mention that these are really good ones to be followed. If followed, a healthy life is for you (too).

In case you have missed the Instruction manual for Life - Click Here

Enjoy this and remember that Health is Wealth - especially if you already have money; if you don't then Health is your ONLY wealth.

Brush twice a day

Dress right for the weather

Visit the dentist regularly


Get plenty of rest

Make sure your hair is dry before going outside

Eat right

Get outside in the sun every once in a while

Always wear a seat belt

Control your drinking of alcoholic beverages

Smile! It will make you feel better

Don't over indulge yourself

Bathe regularly

Read to exercise the brain

Surround yourself with friends

Stay away from too much caffeine

Use the bathroom regularly

Get plenty of exercise

Have your eyes checked regularly

Eat plenty of vegetables

Believe that people will like you for who you are

Forgive and forget

Take plenty of vacations

Celebrate all special occasions

Pick up a hobby

Love your neighbor as yourself



Stay healthy, stay fit.

More to come, hopefully.


















Saturday, October 13, 2012

Joey from F.R.I.E.N.D.S



Joey Tribbiani from F.R.I.E.N.D.S is a real friend. No friend is better than Joey. If you can recall below scene from the series, you would agree. And the way Matt LeBlanc has portrayed the character is superb. Here are some of the memories.

Well I’m Joey. Yeah, uh, I’m disgusting and I take my underwear off at other people’s homes.

A Great Friend


I love this one... read it, you will know why:

Phoebe: Yeah, so I said, "OK, relax please," y'know, I mean, sex can be just 
about two people right there in the moment, y'know, it's, if he wants to see 
me again he can call and if not, that's fine too. So after a looooot of 
talking. . . I convinced him.
Joey: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got 
you to say he never has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was 
a great idea.
Phoebe: Um-hum.
Joey: This man is my God.

The below one is one of the best dramatic scenes ever:

Joey: All right. [gets up]
Monica: [stopping him] No! Joey, we swore we'd never tell!
Chandler: [running over and joining Monica] They'll never understand!
Joey: Well, we have to say something! We have to get it out! It's eating me 
alive!! Monica got stung by a jellyfish.
Monica: [interrupting] All right!! All right. [walks slowly into the living 
room] I got stung. Stung bad. I couldn't stand. I-I couldn't walk.
Chandler: [following Monica] We were two miles from the house. Scared and 
alone. We didn't think we could make it. [He goes to put his hands on Monica's 
shoulders but for some reason can quite complete the action and pulls back.]
Monica: I was in too much pain.
Joey: And I was tired from digging the huge hole!
Chandler: And then Joey remembered something.
Joey: I'd seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Ross: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About 
jellyfish and how if you... [stops suddenly and turns to look at Monica] 
Ewwww!! You peed on yourself?!
Phoebe and Rachel: Ewwww!!
Monica: You can't say that!! You-you don't know!! I mean I thought I was 
gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldn't...bend that 
way. So... [looks at Joey.]
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: [turning to look at Joey] Ewwww!!
Joey: That's right I stepped up! She's my friend and she needed help! And if 
I had too, I'd pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldn't. I got the stage 
fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I 
turned to Chandler.
Chandler: [wails loudly into his hands] Joey kept screaming at me: "Do it 
now! Do it!! Do it! Do it now!!". 
Sometimes late at night I can still here the screaming.
Joey: [laughs] That's cause sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak 
you out.
Joey from F.R.I.E.N.D.S


Joey: Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman. And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition.

[On living alone] 
Joey: I thought it'd be great, you know? have some time alone with my thoughts... turns out, I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think.

Chandler: (entering) Hey, does anybody need anything copied? I'm going down 
to the Xerox place.
Monica: Oh, no thanks.
Chandler: Okay listen, just give me anything I can make two of.
Monica: Well, if you don't have anything to copy, why are you going down 
there?
Joey: Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with the 
belly button ring again?
Chandler: Yeah! You wanna come?
Joey: Yeah!

Joey: Oh, have either one of you guys ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it 
real expensive?
Chandler: Well, only if you order stuff.
Joey: I'm takin' Orsula tonight. It's her birthday.
Ross: Whoa. What about Phoebe's birthday?
Joey: When's that?
Ross: Tonight.
Joey: Oh, man. What're the odds of that happening?
Ross: You take your time.

In case you wonder - Orsula is Phoebe's twin sister.

[after Chandler kisses Kathy] 
Joey: You're so far past the line, you can't even see the line. The line is a dot to you.

And hers is what I am talking about

Joey: Hey, Monica bought a bed from the "Mattress King"?
Phoebe: Yeah, so please, please, please, don't say anything to Chandler.
Joey: You want me to lie to Chandler?
Phoebe: Is that a problem?
Joey: No.

More will come, soon, hopefully.